Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

Scientists discover a 33-foot Jurassic giant, twice as big as its cousin - Earth.com

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

‘The market is as clueless as the Fed’: Why this trader says stocks could continue to do well for months - MarketWatch

I actually pay taxes

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

Why does my cat get anxious during loud noises like thunderstorms or firework displays? Is this a common behavior for cats, and is there a way to help them cope with it?

I have a reading level above third grade

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

Is Tinder the best dating app?

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

Americans Are Growing Less Interested in Buying Electric Vehicles, Study Says - Road & Track

I don’t buy bullshit

I can count

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

What are the signs that a guy wants to marry you but is afraid of commitment or does not want to get married at all?

I have complete contempt for fakery

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

2025 NCAA baseball bracket: Men's College World Series scores, schedule - NCAA.com

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

I have complete contempt for traitorism

I dreamt my mother had died and I cried so much in my dream. What does it mean?

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

Why are the people who don't support the LGBT community treated like super evil and cruel beings? People can have different opinions and thoughts on things.

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

Why did you put a guy’s dick in your mouth the first time?

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

Why are there no fossils for the 'missing link' that connects our ancestors with other species? Is this a misconception or is there another explanation?

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

Decades After Its Joint-Venture Journey Began, Hulu’s Sole Ownership By Disney “Finally Resolved” With $439M Payment To NBCU, Bob Iger Exults - Deadline

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

Trump leans on GOP senators as they gear up to make changes to his domestic policy bill - CNN

I know who the president of Turkey really is

I understand how hurricane paths work

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

Do you like wearing short skirts?

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

I don’t cotton to rapists

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

I see through liars

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

I can read

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.